The knock on the door was nearly silent, yet it kept Eleanor from drifting back to sleep. She didn’t know how but Nelda always knew when to bring her breakfast tray. “Come in Nelda.”
“Good morning Ma’am” Nelda greeted Eleanor as she put the tray on the ornate mahogany table by the bay window. Eleanor pulled back the lace curtain of her pour-poster bed and slipped into her silk robe with the rose applique’ on the collar. Nelda busied herself with smoothing the tablecloth and opening the brocade drapes to let in the morning sun. “I hope you slept well, ma’am.”
“Yes, very well, thank you.” She realized how hungry she was as she ate the poached eggs and toast Nelda had brought. “Are the children ready for school? Be sure to send them up before they leave.”
“They are finishing their breakfast now. I will send them up soon.” After straightening the white duvet Nelda left to supervise the children’s preparations.
Eleanor took her cup to the chaise lounge by the window to leisurely finish her tea.
“Mom! Where’s my new jeans that look faded!”
“Mom! I can’t find my backpack. It has that permission slip in it for the field trip. it needs to be back TODAY!”
“Eleanor, have you seem my blue tie?”
Eleanor took her hands out of the soapy water and dried them. The lunch boxes she had just packed were lined up on the kitchen counter.
“Mommy, Will you put my hair ribbons in my hair?” Another voice was calling her to reality.
“Mom! I asked you where my jeans were!”
“Have I worn your jeans, David?” She always asked the same question when members of her family couldn’t find something. “Have I played with your army guys? Have I worn your pink high-tops? I can’t remember the last time I rode your skateboard.” and after her sarcastic remarks she always gave in to help her family.
Eleanor first went to Megan’s room. She swiftly brushed her hair and pulled it through the cloth-covered rubber band and expertly tied the perfect lavender bow. She kissed Megan on the head and sent her down to breakfast. Eleanor had taken the easy preparations this morning and set out boxes of cereal….prizes already removed.
She walked past the bathroom picking up a dirty sock and pick-up truck on the way to the boys’ room. She tip-toed through the battlefield of army figures, vehicles and brick building blocks on their bedroom floor. After reaching the closet she lifted the gray sweatshirt from the hook and David quickly jumped into his jeans.
Finding the backpack took more effort. She and Jonathan looked under the beds, in the living room and kitchen before they decided to split up. Eleanor went to check the bedroom a second time.
She opened the closet door. This was her most difficult assignment to date as a rookie detective. There seemed to be no clues as to who murdered the famous movie producer. No sign of a struggle or break-in, no finger prints and no weapon had been uncovered. But the number of suspects was increasing with every person they interviewed. His wife discovered the new actress was more than an employee, the director was fired for “artistic” differences. Eleanor was pondering the facts as she crawled on the floor of the walk-in closet. She started to open shoe boxes lined on shelves. Each box had in it a pair of shoes that coordinated the garments hanging above: red with red, crystals with crystals, aqua with aqua… “who wears aqua?” she wondered. A pearl-gripped hand gun with….. Eleanor called for the sergeant.
“I found it! It was behind the hamper in the bathroom! Mom? Where are you?”
Eleanor came out of the closet dusting spider webs off her jeans. “I’ve got to get in there and do some serious cleaning.” she thought.
By the time she reached the room she shared with her husband he was tying the blue tie.
“I found it , Honey. Thanks.”
Finally, everyone arrived downstairs for breakfast. The chatter was centered around their activities for the day. Once the drop-off and pick-up schedule was deciphered Eleanor quickly signed the permission slip and returned it to the backpack. She handed each of the the appropriate lunch box, kissed them on the forehead and sent them off to the bus stop.
Bill, her husband, peeked at her from behind the newspaper and smiled. Eleanor wondered what he was up to. He slid an envelope across the table. Eleanor opened it and removed the paper. She couldn’t believe her eyes. ” A Cruise! But I thought we had to get the roof fixed this summer!”
“Are you surprised?” He took her in his strong arms and kissed her like he had done before the children were around.
A vacation would be a welcome reprieve from her daily routine.
“Eleanor, have you seen my keys?” Bill said as he put on his overcoat. She picked up the keys from the counter by the cookie jar. “Thanks, honey. I don’t know what we’d do without you.” A short peck on the check before he left for work. ” Now don’t forget to call the roofers on that list I gave you this morning. We need to start getting estimates. Bye?”
Eleanor took a deep breath. The echoes of the hurried morning still lingered in the air. She sat down at the kitchen table to review the list and finish her lukewarm cup of coffee.
This story of fantasy and reality I have lived. It seems I haven’t lived so much in the now, content but wishing life was easier, problem free, less hectic. In all this wishing, the fantasizing I forgot to cherish the now. My boys, now adults, with children of their own, no longer live with me. They find their own backpacks and keys and have wives with whom to share their responsibilities and I miss the hectic in this quiet time of life. Some of the fantasies continue but as I look back on a life I hope, well lived I see God’s handiwork: in times of stress, His peace, in times of fear my faith grew, in times of pain, depression and anxiety I felt His healing. God is writing this story of my life for others to see.
In Philippians 4:11,12 Paul talks about being content. “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”
Now, me, I always seem to want something more, to not have to struggle with finances, to have more energy and stamina, to work harder, faster. A newer car would definitely help. I fantasize about being more giving, more extrovert, less scared, more sane, less sad. And, yet, I am so blessed; I strive to be content in all things.
Synonyms listed for content include: satisfied, pleased, cheerful, unworried, untroubled. I must admit, most days I miss this mark. God must have known this because in Philippians 4:13, after the verses about being content, He encourages us with “I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” By my own will, as a soloist I cannot find my worry-free life. I am content as I look to God, as I trust Him with all my heart.
I can trust His plan for my life. I can live in joy each day as I live my stories…my life…my dreams… my prayers for myself, my husband, my kids, grandkids, my family and my friends. I am thankful for all the story of my life.
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