Annie’s Circle

Once upon a time there was a circus pony, Annie was her name.  She was small and timid, a muddy brown color; she thought herself to be quite unlovely.  Most of her days were spent watching majestic horses dressed in sparkles with their equally bedazzled riders preforming elaborate tricks.  There was envy in her heart as she preformed her only duty of giving those “snot-nosed kids” (her words, not mine) rides around and around the same  monotonous circle.  Circles that never ended, tethered to a pole decorated with a rainbow of high-flying balloons- not for Annie’s enjoyment but to attract more kids that pulled her mane, pinched her ribs and screamed too loudly.

Annie’s dream of not walking in circles came one sunny Fall day when she was told she was going to be “put out to pasture” and her days of work were over.  Annie did not understand pasture but she was so ready to get away from those “snot-nosed kids”!

Once released into the pasture Annie froze. “What do I do?” she asked a young raven maned filly named Nellie.  “Whatever you want, You’re free!”  Nellie ran in the open field to ….somewhere!  Annie spied a nearby tree with colorful leaves that resembled her stake with the high flying balloons, and there, in keeping with what was familiar she began walking in circles. In sunshine, in rain, in wind, in snow always she walked in circles.. Each day Nellie asked Annie to come exploring with her and Annie would decline, “I don’t know what’s out there.”  The grass that was once under the tree had worn bare and a rut was being formed by Annie’s circles.

Nellie was not one to surrender, and she tried again to coax Annie from her circle of comfort.  “Annie, we must get you out of that rut before you are forever stuck!”

Annie thought of the beautiful circus horses and her old dream of running free, of being more and with a timid voice declared, “Yes, I will go with you!”  Annie jumped out of her rutted circle and followed Nellie through soft grasses, to a field of sunflowers, to a refreshing bubbling brook.  Annie could not believe the beauty before her eyes, so much better than even the bedazzled circus horses.   She leaped and frolicked with joy and thanksgiving. She had found her true home.

So often I have lived like Annie staying in my circle of familiarity and comfort; my circle of fear, of insecurity, of feeling unlovely, and unworthy- forgetting that God has set me free from this self-imposed prison.

Galations 2:20 says ” I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live but Christ lives in me.;  The life I live in the Body I live by faith in the son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”   Not only did Jesus, by his great love die for me but I have been crucified with Him, have shared a death with Him that I could live in resurrection victory.

I do not always feel I live in the victory of Christ but in bondage of nagging doubt, in questioning my purpose, my contribution, my reason for being. This lately has become my circle and the grass is wearing thin.  But at the moment I need it God’s hope pierces the darkness and I pray once again for “a sign”, a confirmation of that purpose and I wonder if God ever tires of my repetitive, constant requests for reasons and purpose.

D.L. Moody said, “Some people think God does not like to be troubled with our constant coming and asking.  The way to trouble God is not to come at all.”

The price has been aid, we not only share in the crucifixion of Jesus, we totally share in the resurrection power.  Philippians 3:10 has been a favorite verse of mine.

“I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his suffering, becoming like him in his death and so somehow to attain to the resurrection from the dead.”  I knowing Christ in his death and resurrection we can live in victory as more than conquerors.   Let us live up to what we have already attained as Paul says in Philippians 3:16.

Whatever your circles : pain, fear, uncertainty, broken relationships, let us all remember we are already free to leap and run and explore victory.